Page 129 - Cityview Magazine - July/August 2017
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house, you remember that? You said, “I’m thinking about just going home.” Now did you have any trepidation about how your brothers would feel about that?
B: Absolutely. I struggled with even the thought of going off by myself and doing anything without my brothers. Because I felt like we toiled together, we traveled together, we ran together, we did it all together. We always knew and we were taught to stay together. Everyone said, “Guys, make sure ya’ll stay together no matter what.”
H: So, we have that conversation. I’m always super pragmatic. I say, “are you sure, and have you thought this through?” We went over to Lakeshore Park and you were asking me, “how do you put your life together?” I said, “If you had unlimited time, talent, money, and support, what would you do with your life? ” And I saw you as we started writing down numbers and ideas, and on a couple of them you looked up like, “Do I have permission to pick this?” Do you remember that?
B: I do, because again I felt as if I’d be considered a renegade, a traitor.
H: We sat there, and I wrote down the responsibilities that you currently had, and they were all in a very tight, religious box. And over here was that list of things you said you would really love to explore, and all of those things were outside of that box. B: And all of the things that were outside of the box gave me the most joy.
H: Right. I drew an arrow and a stick man, and I drew that line outside of the box, and when I drew that line outside of the box, you thought of all the people in that box that you thought you would either have to leave, or that would leave you, if you moved outside the box. What happened that day that you were at the table?
B: Do I have to share that again? I sat there at the table struggling to accept the fact that who I am doesn’t fit inside the box so many other people want me to be in. And tears began to come down my face. I began to weep. I’ve always been one to consider myself a loyal guy and have integrity, and
I felt like in that moment I was letting all of that go. I was becoming a man I said I would never become: a liar, a traitor. That was my struggle. Either do what you feel
you’ve been created to do, or do what others think you have been created to do. There’s a fine line between inability and accountabil- ity: it’s one thing to not have the ability to do certain things—you can’t dance, or you don’t have the wits to be a doctor, or you’re unable to be an engineer. It’s another thing if you have all of those gifts, and the love
of God inside your heart, but yet you still choose not to use them.
H: Have you heard Steve Jobs’ quote about living someone else’s dream?
B:No.
H: Here’s what Steve Jobs said: “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma, which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own
inner voice.” B:Wow.
H: It sounds like that’s what you were struggling with. Then I asked you a really important question: I said, “Are you ready to tell them?” I said you can’t sneak. You’ve
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