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laugh
illustration by r. Daniel Proctor
THE KNOXONOMIST
Dear Knoxonomist,
Nashville is known as “Music
City,” but from what I hear,
Knoxville has a tradition
that rivals Nashville.
I have enjoyed seeing
many live performances
here, and I think I like
the diversity in the music
better. Am I starting an
argument I can’t win?
Merry Dee Lewis
—Fountain City
Dear Person Who Argues About Hank Williams, Sr., also played where they were? Did anybody really
Things That Don’t Matter:
Knoxville several times in his short and know what time it was? Did anybody
storied career, and is alleged to have really care?
Yes—but that’s fine. People do it all checked out of the Andrew Johnson Any discussion of live music in
the time—particularly when arguing Hotel dead. Where he passed and when Knoxville would be incomplete if it did
with the Knoxonomist. Knoxville has have all been heavily speculated upon, not include a few words on the contri-
been a big deal in music and live music but the Knoxonomist wishes to think of butions of college-aged garage bands
since rural electrification. Knoxville it as a fusion of “Weekend at Bernie’s” of every decade. The names and genres
was live music to folks in the Ten- with “The Hangover” with “The grapes change, but the youthful angst is always
nessee Valley, because all radio was of Wrath.” It just seems cooler that way.
the same. Still, it is truly one of life’s
live. Early on, the acts lacked much Famed Russian composer Sergei little jokes that all nonconformists end
variety, but prior to the advent of live Rachmaninoff played his last perfor- up looking the same, no matter how
radio, folks were listening to pappy on mance in Knoxville, as did Rock and they hold their clove cigarette.
a penny whistle or grandma playing Roll guitarist Randy Rhoads—which Bottom line? The Knoxonomist is oc-
“Danny Boy” on the nose harp—and only proves that if your last name starts casionally nostalgic for a bar with lousy
this was progress.
with an “R,” Knoxville should be near live music, a smelly carpet, several code
Homer and Jethro were one of those the end of your touring schedule.
violations, and with the stones to serve
early acts that performed in Knoxville. During the 1970s, all of the most- only old Milwaukee Beer in tall cans.
They were a two-man comedy team popular music acts who toured Talk about knowing your market.
who were seriously accomplished routinely came to the Civic Coli-
musicians. Visualize the whitest two seum. Indeed, when concerts were lit the Knoxonomist welcomes your questions—although
guys you could possibly imagine—then with Bic lighters instead of iPhones, he will answer only those that interest him. Send your
think a little less funky. This was Knoxville routinely punched above its inquiries to TheKnoxonomist@cityviewmag.com, and
genteel vaudeville. Think of them as weight. The performers often forgot include your name, address, and daytime phone number.
the Smothers Brothers for people who in which city they were playing, but it The Knoxonomist and his secretary are busy, however, and
wore button-up shoes.
was the 70s—did anyone really know
regret that we cannot acknowledge receipt of e-mails.
46 cityviewmag.com january february 2014